“The Art of Seeing”

By Simrat Pal Kaur

The time I spent alone allowed me to connect with myself and rediscover an important lesson I’ve always known was worth remembering, yet I kept ignoring it. That lesson is to “See the world through your own eyes.”

People, thoughts, every notion—everything! See it from your perspective. It makes life so much easier and helps you become the best possible version of yourself. This shift not only helped me in my academics but transformed every aspect of my life. It brings me immense joy, brings me closer to my passions, and makes me me.

Not too long ago, I was insecure and obsessed with what others were doing. I tried being like them, thinking like them, and adopting their approaches, routines, habits, and entire perspectives. But it didn’t work at all. It stripped me of my identity and the unique gifts I had.

Often, we find ourselves around people or in places that may not be the best for us. Our approaches to life, our goals, and our interests may differ, and we may not be understood. This leads to the infamous “Grass is greener on the other side” syndrome, where we aren’t secure enough to realize that our own side is just fine.

Ask yourself: Is this me, or am I expressing someone else’s opinion about how things should be? Often, when you spend a lot of time with the same people, you unconsciously adopt their thoughts or behaviors. It’s completely natural; we all have friends, family, or colleagues we spend a lot of time with.

Whatever it is, take some time for yourself. Even your thoughts shouldn’t revolve around others, and definitely no social media. Focus entirely on yourself. Ask yourself: Who am I? What do I think? What do I feel? What do I want? What do I think is good for me? Does it make me happy?

Is this really what I think? Is this really what I feel? Is this really what I want? Is this making me happy? (Keyword: I)

“The more I lose myself in the crowd, the harder it is to get back to myself, my heart.”

Occasionally, remove yourself from your daily routine, and for a few days, focus solely on yourself. Just you. Then take a brief look back at the people and environments you interact with. You’ll notice how much you’ve unconsciously absorbed from them and how it has shifted your perspective, sometimes to the point where you’ve lost a part of yourself. If that’s not the case, you’re fine. But if you feel even a slight disconnect, maybe it’s time to spend some more time alone and rediscover yourself.

Another thing worth mentioning, besides the “grass is greener” syndrome, is that this often happens when we stop saying yes to new experiences, when we get stuck in a mundane routine and stop doing the things we love.

Solitude is important. It doesn’t always need to be seen as negative. Sometimes it’s beautiful, exciting, and crucial to growth. It’s your path to self-discovery and finding your passions. It helps you understand yourself on the deepest level. It makes you stronger and allows you to meet the real you. It reveals the purest version of yourself, free from external influence. It makes you love and cherish yourself more than anything or anyone else in this world ever could.

Of course, we do carry parts of the people we meet and interact with, and some of them leave a lasting impact on us, leading to change. That’s beautiful and completely natural—as long as it doesn’t take away your authenticity. Don’t let that happen. Don’t let insecurity overshadow the uniqueness within you. Appreciate the beauty around you but remain grounded enough to never question your own worth.

The purpose of this article isn’t to promote self-isolation. The people and environment around us play an important role in shaping us, and change is an essential part of life, as we see in nature.

Rather, it’s to remind you of the importance of solitude and to remember that you were created uniquely for a reason. To dismiss your individuality in an effort to be like someone else is to disregard the beauty and power that you possess.

We are all different, like flowers—each beautiful in our own way. It’s a cliché, I know, but recently, even the quotes on my table calendar have been speaking to me.

It’s great to have role models, but it’s even better to be your own. (This one’s from me, not the calendar!)

To those who stayed by my side, and to those who noticed how dull the room felt when I didn’t smile—thank you. I’m back to being my best self, with a newfound sense of self-knowledge that solitude has gifted me. I’m grateful to everyone who reminded me to be my lively self again—not just to make others happy, but because it’s who I am.

I’m doing great, and I wish the same for all of you.

Love,
Simrat